I have the right to be envious.
I have the right to be jealous.
I have the right to be upset.
About what you may ask?? About all of my new mommy friends that never return to their jobs. It seems here lately the more new mom's I talk to are becoming SAHM's(Stay At Home Mom) and I'm insanely jealous of any mom that gets to do that. Oh, how I dream of the days I would spend with Noah. Playing with him, listening to his laugh, letting him pull my hair, squealing when we do "peek a boo"....
But no. Not this mom. Only on the weekends. Which, by the way, is why on the weekends I'm an absolute hermit. I want to cherish every waking minute I have with him since I get maybe 2 hours to spend with him during the week.
Don't get me wrong, I know being a SAHM is no walk in the park. But neither is being a working mom. Both have their pro's and con's.
And on the flip side, I knew going into this I wouldn't be able to be a SAHM...and I'm truly OK with it because I want Noah to have nice things. I want us to go on nice vacations. I never want to have to tell Noah he can't have or do something. So, that's OK with me. I'm more than willing to sacrifice for him...because at the end of the day he is my world. I do get to come home to his smiling face...which makes working a little less painful. But after talking to my husband about this...and after some irritability passed I finally just told him that I know I can't be a SAHM, but I do have the right to be jealous and upset. I'm a female...and I have the right to be emotional if I want to!
Today is just a day for me to rant, because here recently my "mom envy" if you want to call it has been super crazy intense! I'm happy for all of my friends that get to stay at home with their kids, at least someone does ;) We all do what we have to do for our children. I also know that I'm not the only mom out there that has to work. Again. Just a ranting day for me. So, thanks for listening :)
Hi Leah!
ReplyDeleteNice blog! I’m following you from Follow Me Chickadee Friday. Please follow me back on my blog “Inspire!”
Ron
http://inspiredbyron.blogspot.com/
Thank you for coming back with the link! I didnt know how to find you! lol I am following back!
ReplyDeleteMommy Minded
Leah,
ReplyDeleteI understand! I couldn't bare putting my 12 week (not even 5lb baby) in daycare! I am thankful I do get to be a SAHM but I definitely understand where you're coming from! You do what you've got to do to make the BEST life for your child you can! He'll understand and appreciate you more for the sacrifice you make when he's an adult!
Oh Leah! You so do NOT have to explain yourself or give yourself the "right" to feel that way! Trust me, every. single. mother. that I know has SOMETHING about their parenthood that they wish could be "ideal" or "perfect." Motherhood is ALL about sacrifice & like you said YOU choose to work so that you can have/do the things you like & no one can second-guess you for that. But just remember, it may not ALWAYS have to be that way... You may very well be blessed with the opportunity to stay home full-time in the future. Just as much as sacrifice, motherhood is also about "seasons..." ;-)
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